A lesson in self-regulation

On our way to school I can see my 6yo, dressed as Mario for Wolrd Book Day (complete with giant hat and moustache), hurtling down the steep hill on his scooter, on the busy main road, much faster than usual. He seems wobbly, a bit like a caravan about to jack-knife on the motorway. He’s too far ahead to hear me if I call him and I feel a rush of fear.


My mind flashes images of him going under a bus at my subconscious, as I calmly tell my 10yo his brother is scaring me and ask him to go catch up with him on his scooter, which is much faster than I am. Just as I finish the sentence, little one goes out of sight around a bend and I hear a scream…

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Humanity... the light and the dark

The current news story regarding Trump's separation of children from their immigrant parents is shocking.

Trump has been so focused on his "zero tolerance" protection of American borders, that he has separated parents from their children, including infants and toddlers, so that the adults can be prosecuted and the children taken to detention centers. These children, many of whom are already fleeing disturbing trauma, are now living a terrifying nightmare, removed from the safe attachment figures they would turn to for comfort and reassurance... and placed in the care of staff who are not allowed to touch or comfort them. 

Then, due to administrative failures, children have been 'lost', parents have been deported without their children, who remain in care, with no way of being reunited. This kind of psychological trauma and toxic stress is hugely damaging.

Watch out Trump, in ten to fifteen years you will have a new lot of angry damaged youth just ripe for radicalization. Don't look surprised and hurt when you're on the receiving end of terrorist attacks, look back into your giant failure of a presidency, your damaging, cruel, badly thought out, selfish policies, and your inability to feel compassion and empathy.

But, looking for the silver lining... I am again proud of my fellow compassionate humans for making sure this news is public, for finding the time to write incredibly well-thought out, well-argued, well-evidenced articles, such as this one from Parenting Science, which spells out very clearly exactly how and why this is so damaging to the children involved: https://www.parentingscience.com/immigrant-children-still-separated-and-need-help.html

A trip down memory lane

So I finally had the opportunity to come and visit the old site of The Arches...

I just stood in what would have been the entrance to the club, instantly transported back to memories of the click,  the till, the queues, the lists, the bouncers, the amazing characters full of beans and dressed like rainbows..

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A non-perfect Mothers day

Today I have been both spoiled and tested by my younglings, with handmade gifts full of love, a long lie in, breakfast in bed, and several episodes of challenging behavior. 

During the most epic of meltdowns I reminded myself that just because the consumerist world labelled this day special, doesn’t mean young children can put their feelings on hold, or fast forward through these phases of development, lack of impulse control and emotional regulation.

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Welcome to my new site.

A place for my music and my thoughts about my three key passions; songwriting, childhood and parenthood.

I feel like I have things to say... 

...and now the university mist has cleared, I shall find the time to say them!